My New Axe

I finally got a new guitar. Up until now the only guitar I had ever owned was the old nylon-string classical guitar my brother-in-law Lance gave me when I was 13 or 14. It has been a perfectly serviceable instrument for all these years and it's great for certain styles of music so I'm definitely planning to hold on to it.

However, during my final year in Ann Arbor I had a guitar affair with my roommate Peter's steel-sting acoustic (with his permission, of course). I would take it out of his room every morning, mess around on it all day, and then stick it back in his room at night (he's an early sleeper so most of the time I just put it back in its case and leaned it up against his door after just before I went to bed). It was much more suitable for the type of stuff I typically play and it had a great feel, but when I left Ann Arbor, I had to say goodbye to it (as seen here).

Ever since then I've been shopping around for a guitar. It turned out that my first paycheck from Yahoo! coincided with a big sale at Guitar Center, and as Homer Simpson's brain once taught us, money can be exchanged for goods and services.

I had four criteria when looking for a new guitar: 1) steel strings (as opposed to nylon like my old guitar), 2) acoustic/electric (meaning you can play it like a normal acoustic guitar but also plug it in), 3) cutaway (a notch cut out of the body to allow greater access to the highest frets), and 4) not a piece of crap (since I conceivably could go another decade or so without buying another guitar and I don't want to bemoan my choice every time I pick it up).

So say hello to my new guitar. I really like the grain of the wood on it. When I first showed it to my nephews one of them called it a tiger guitar, so I've decided to name it"Tigrão" (pronounced "chee-grau(n)"), which has three meanings in Portuguese:

1) Literally, "Big Tiger" - Tigre (tiger) + -ão (big) = Tigrão
2) It's the Portuguese name for Tigger (as in Winnie the Pooh - I suppose you can call my guitar Tigger if you wanted to)
3) It was the name of this awesomely lame, Macarena-style dance craze that swept across Brazil while I was on my mission (Here's a demonstration. Sample lyrics: "Want to dance? Want to dance? Tigrão will teach you... Hammer that hammer, like this, like this," which is of course accompanied by a hammer action.) I started singing it at work one day and all the Brazilians cringed in horror. It was awesome.

A few days after I bought it I had my first chance to bust it out* at the Portland Area LDS Performer's Concert. Here I am playing "If I Loved You" from Carousel by Rodgers and Hammerstein and "The Girl from Ipanema" by Antônio Carlos Jobim (which some of you may remember as the encore of my all-Brazilian dissertation recital at Michigan):



*If while watching that video you thought to yourself, "Wait a minute, that's not Tigrão! That's an impostor!" well, then you're right. That was the guitar I actually purchased, but after a few days I noticed this faint buzzing sound emanating from the A and low E strings. I took it back and traded it for a much stripier guitar of the same model.

Seen at Safeway

1. Ranch Pecan Ice Cream

This can't be ranch-flavored ice cream, right? I bought it out of morbid curiosity. Maybe ranch ice cream will be the next big thing!

2. Ezekiel 4:9 Cereal
This cereal is either being marketed to religious zealots or hippies. True to the name of the cereal, the box art incorporates the first half of the Old Testament verse:

Ezekiel 4:9 - Take thou also unto thee wheat, and barley, and beans, and lentiles, and millet, and ^afitches [OR spelt (a type of wheat)] and put them in one vessel, and make thee bread thereof...

Q. How can you prevent Brian from buying a cereal named Ezekiel 4:9 despite his curiosity?
A. Charge $6.29 for it!

SST: Heeeeere Fishy Fishy Fishy!

SESAME STREET TUESDAY

My friend Elizabeth recently turned me on to a weekly podcast called "Pop Culture Happy Hour," a loose, funny roundtable discussion among four members of the NPR arts and entertainment staff. Recently they devoted an entire show to things from pop culture that children should not miss out on, eliciting such suggestions as The Muppet Show, Fantasia, Pee-Wee's Playhouse, They Might Be Giants, and Schoolhouse Rock. One answer given by panelist Stephen Thompson really resonated with me: "General advice for those who want to set their children on the proper path, entertainment-wise: have a crazy uncle... who is there to expose your kids to weird pop culture."

This is a responsibility that I have felt for years as an uncle, it is something that I have mentioned before in this space, and it is one of the reasons that I started the Sesame Street Tuesday feature in the first place. I had a very rewarding moment talking to my niece Kate on the phone the other day when she told me that she pulls up my blog to show Sesame Street clips to her friends (no doubt skipping over the long-winded ruminations that precede the clips). I've felt similar satisfaction when watching my nieces' and nephews' faces light up when they watched the bus stop scene from My Neighbor Totoro for the first time, hearing them repeat the punchlines from Calvin and Hobbes, seeing them contort their faces and limbs in an imitation of Artie (The Strongest Man... in the World!) from The Adventures of Pete & Pete, or doing Beatles sing-alongs with me on my guitar.

However, yesterday I felt like I had somewhat failed in this regard when we were at a trout farm and my sister Emily's call of "Heeeeeeere fishy fishy fishy!" drew blank stares from the kids. It's one of the all-time great Sesame Street sketches and in the two-plus years I've been running this feature I somehow have never presented it. So allow me to now correct that gross oversight:



The aforementioned incident happened at the Bonneville Fish Hatchery, home of Herman the Sturgeon, who is 11 feet long, 500 pounds, and 70 years old. I can't find anything to confirm this, but here's my hypothesis: that native Portlander/Simpsons creator Matt Groening used Herman as the inspiration for General Sherman, the legendary giant catfish from a season 2 episode. The name is just off by one letter (plus a military title) and the species is changed from sturgeon to catfish, and this scrap of exposition from the episode seems to fit: "Yep, 'General Sherman.' They say he's five hundred pounds of bottom-dwelling fury, don't you know. No one knows how old he is, but if you ask me (and most people do), he's hundred years if he's a day." So if you're reading this, Matt Groening, leave me a comment and tell me if I'm off base with this.

P.S. - The first time someone introduced me to Homestarrunner.com they showed me the Strong Bad Email "Lures and Jigs," which I saw as a clear rip-off of Bert and Ernie. It dissuaded me from coming back to the site for a year or two, after which time I realized the Brothers Chaps are geniuses with highly original voices and that this email was either an aberration or a deliberate Bert and Ernie homage:

SST: Cookie Monster Buys a Rhyme/Bein' Green

SESAME STREET TUESDAY

Since this week has two holidays, today we're getting two clips. The first holiday can be a little bit hard to remember:



I myself had forgotten that yesterday (3/14) was Pi Day until the early afternoon when Yahoo! laid out a spread of about twenty different types of pie. You know you work for a nerdy company when they officially commemorate Pi Day (I mean that as a compliment).

Yahoo! is planning a much larger party for the second holiday this week:



Happy March!

Keep Portland Weird

As seen in this ubiquitous bumper sticker (co-opted from "Keep Austin Weird!"), Portland is proud to be weird. Through outlets such as the new TV series Portlandia the proudly weirdo culture of Portland has become increasingly well-known across the country.

However, I didn't know about Portland's reputation until after I got here in November*, and in the four-ish months I've been living in the area I hadn't really participated in anything especially Portlandy. So I decided to make today a Super Portland Day:

1. I had heard on the radio that this weekend was the annual Portland Urban Iditarod, run through the streets of downtown Portland with shopping carts instead of sleds and people instead of dogs. They had me at shopping carts, so today I went down to check out the action. I headed downtown in my car without knowing beforehand where I should go to catch the race, but I had no trouble finding it because once I got within four blocks of the course I could hear what sounded sounded like the world's most raucous party:



I had a blast watching this. The shopping cart-sled template pulled out a zany, childlike energy out of all these twenty- and thirty-somethings that was absolutely infectious. I was dazzled by the sheer amount of creativity and bravado on the part of every single team and loved how this wacky event provided a mode of self-expression that didn't hurt anyone and just came off as a giant celebration of life. Any kind of social or political gesture that may have been made was softened by the absurdity of it all, such as the mock fistfight captured in this video:



2. If you look at the other side of the street in that second video you can see the tents and booths of the Portland Saturday Market. They had taken a winter hiatus at the end of December and had just started the market back up again last weekend. It reminded me of a smaller-scale Ann Arbor Art Fair (to be fair, this does run from March to December, whereas the Art Fair in Ann Arbor, while massive, only lasts a week), with the same kind of hippie arts and crafts and live music (I saw a rootsy Americana group called The Conjugal Visitors).

3. I stopped at the downtown Portland branch** of the Multnomah County Library to pick up a library card. About 6 weeks ago I moved to Beaverton in adjacent Washington County, and as a resident of a neighboring county they granted me a card. I don't imagine I'll make the trip out to use their libraries very often, but one of the perks of membership is access to a service called Freegal Music. They have a huge library of music and I am allowed three free downloads per week through my library card. Score! (A shout-out to my sister Emily and her incredible deal-finding powers for that tip.)

4. Before leaving the downtown I picked up a gyro at one of Portland's famous food carts. These carts are so awesome - they are tiny little stalls or trucks or campers that set up shop on the outside edge of parking lots facing the sidewalk. They are everywhere (the internet says there are over 400 in downtown Portland) and they have a staggering range of choices, whether it be hot dogs and burgers or Vietnamese Phở.

5. Portland is a major player in the shoe market; my new house is just a few blocks away from the Nike World Campus where there are dozens of buildings and a big beautiful artificial lake that I've jogged past along the public-access running trails. Adidas also has its U.S. headquarters in Portland, and Yahoo! recently gave all of its employees a pass to the Adidas employee store with a 50%-off coupon. I went there today and ended up getting a good deal on the pair of shoes on the left, which are the lightest, most comfortable things I've ever put on my feet - it's like wearing a cloud covered in pillow feathers. I've never had a pair of shoes with such loud, funky colors, but maybe I was emboldened by the lack of inhibition I witnessed at the Urban Iditarod.

6. My Portland day isn't quite over yet, so if you'll excuse me I've got to go put some birds on things:



*Shortly after I got here I read an article in the Oregonian newspaper called "Is Portland the New Neverland?" that made me feel like such a cliché. Like many of the people profiled in the article I was in my late twenties, I had a degree (or three) in the arts, I was unemployed and uncertain about my next move, I was living with my sister, and I had been drawn in by Portland's magnetic pull. I guess I lost a lot of my Portland hipster cred by turning thirty, getting a job (in the tech industry, no less), and moving out of my sister's house.

**This library branch also has a large, beautiful children's section named after beloved Portland author Beverly Cleary. Apparently she named several characters after Portland landmarks (i.s. Quimby St.) and set most of her stories in the city. Sidenote: Matt Groening, the creator of The Simpsons, is also from Portland and he named many characters after street names. As a Simpsons fan it is fun to drive down Flanders Street, Lovejoy Street, or Terwilliger Boulevard.

Year of Songs: Songs for Casimir Pulaski Day

Happy Casimir Pulaski Day tomorrow! Casimir Pulaski Day, you ask? Quoth Wikipedia:

Casimir Pulaski Day is a holiday observed in Illinois on the first Monday of every March in memory of Casimir Pulaski (March 6, 1745 – October 11, 1779), a Revolutionary War cavalry officer born in Poland as Kazimierz Pułaski... The day is celebrated mainly in areas that have large Polish populations, such as Chicago. Chicago Public Schools, Cook County government offices, the Chicago Public Library, Springfield Public Schools, and state-wide public and private schools close on this holiday.

(I know at least one of my readers might be affected by the holiday. You know who you are.)

1. "Casimir Pulaski Day" - Sufjan Stevens
This song is a devastating short story about bone cancer taking the life of a teenage girl and shaking the faith of those left behind. The tale reaches its sad end in a hospital room on the eponymous holiday:

In the morning in the winter shade
On the first of March, on the holiday
I thought I saw you breathing

2. "Águas de Março (Waters of March)" - Elis Regina & Tom Jobim
This song has been recorded by practically every major Brazilian artist, and by many non-Brazilians as well, but this wonderfully playful and spontaneous duet is the definitive version. It's a marriage of two of the most beloved figures in Brazilian music: singer Elis Regina and composer Tom Jobim. March is the end of summer in Brazil, and it's when the rainy season starts, hence the refrain "it's the waters of March closing the summer, and it's the promise of life in your heart."

The song on its own is incredibly charming, but this video of the recording session pushes it over the top (especially around 2:53):



3. "Água de Beber (Water to Drink)" - Incognito + Omar + Ana Caram
I randomly picked up this CD at the library recently called "Red Hot + Rio" simply because it had Rio in the title. Turns out it's this charity album from 1996 full of these funky, very mid-nineties-sounding reworkings of bossa nova standards by a bunch of artists you've either completely forgotten about (remember P.M. Dawn?) or never heard of (i.e. Incognito, Omar, and Ana Caram). The collection overall is quite uneven, but I dig this version of "Água de Beber," another Tom Jobim composition, that incorporates a fragment of the aforementioned "Águas de Março" at the beginning.

4. "The Wild Hunt" - The Tallest Man on Earth
I discovered this Swedish folk singer whose voice is definitely an acquired taste on NPR's All Songs Considered podcast (which I highly recommend - it has introduced me to all kinds of fantastic music). It begins:

There is a crow moon coming in well you keep looking out
It is the hollow month of March now sweeping in

5. "Liberty Bell March" - John Phillip Sousa
A march by the March King for the month of March. Try and guess why this is my favorite Sousa March - I'll give you a little hint:



6. "Backwards Down the Number Line" - Phish* This is my favorite birthday song and today, March 6th, is a day when a very special person has his birthday: Casimir Pulaski.

*Got a text from my friend John the other day: "I'm at a Trey Anastasio [lead singer of Phish] acoustic solo show right now, he just played Backwards down the number line for me. Reminded me of you :)" Like you do.

***************

As always, please use comments to tell me about any great March songs I might have missed, or if you have any suggestions for April (so far there's only been one person who has made any suggestions and I've used them all). As we get into the spring it seems to be a more inspirational time for songwriters so I'm sure there are tons of great song ideas out there.