Vindicated!

I was in Chicago in 1994 … and at this time I had no thoughts of coming back and playing the game of basketball. Bryon Russell came over to me and said, ‘Why’d you quit? You know I could guard you. If I ever see you in a pair of shorts …’  

When I did come back in 1995 and we played Utah in ‘96, I’m at the center circle and Bryon Russell is standing next to me. I said, "You remember the [comments] you made in 1994 about, ‘I think I can guard you, I can shut you down, I would love to play against you? Well, you’re about to get your chance."

The quote above comes from Michael Jordan's Hall of Fame induction speech, in which we learned that what drove him to greatness was petty grudges based on past slights.

Likewise, I have held a petty grudge since Memorial Day weekend 2008 that has given me motivation. I quote my own blog:

...on Sunday night our ward FHE activity was a Jell-O competition, I am holding my entry in that same picture on the left - Gelatina Colorida. It's a dessert I had frequently in Brazil, consisting of various colors of Jell-O cubed and then encased in a mixture of sweetened condensed milk, heavy cream, and unflavored gelatin... There were only seven entries in the contest and there were five grand prizes and mine failed to win any of them. Even a plate of lemon Jell-O with peas and string beans in it, which even its creator declared inedible, won a prize. The only other participant who didn't win a prize was Brady Emmett, and his dish didn't even have Jell-O in it (it was tapioca pudding). They did invent an honorary award for my dish ("Most Least American"), but My Gelatina Colorida losing out on the real awards was the biggest snub since The Color Purple went 0 for 11 at the 1986 Oscars.

Flash forward to today. At work we had a purple dessert competition (it is Yahoo!, after all), and I once again made Gelatina Colorida, only this time I only used purple Jell-O to fit the theme. I even painstakingly carved out the Yahoo! logo into the purple Jell-O with a knife. I was afraid that once again the American palettes of the judges might not understand my dish.

However, near the end of the day the contest results popped up in my inbox:

Like before, an additional award was created for me, but unlike the condescending "Most Least American" (which I admit is pretty clever), instead they gave this more flattering qualification: "Given the array of yummy creations this year, we were actually able to add another prize to honor a 4th place winner as well!" My prize? A cake pan with a cover and handle, and a set of quiche pans. Score!

So kids, always hold grudges ;)

Year of Songs: September of My Years

September Song &
September of My Years - Frank Sinatra
Frank Sinatra turned 50 in 1965, and to mark the occasion he recorded the incredibly reflective and age-conscious album September of My Years. Just a glance at the song titles betrays his preoccupation with his age: "How Old Am I?" "Last Night When We Were Young," "The Man in the Looking Glass." The track "It Was a Very Good Year" (the "when I was seventeen..." song) went on to be one of the songs most associated with Sinatra, but for my money the real showstopper on the disc is his performance of the Kurt Weill standard "September Song." So many other singers interpret this song in a glib way, but Sinatra gives it a gravity that makes it profoundly moving.

"September of My Years" is the the album's one newly composed tune, and I have also included it here. It's a nice song, but a little bit on the nose thematically (and some of the lyrics read as a little bit creepy in 2011).

Into the Fire &
You're Missing - Bruce Springsteen
A very different album that came to mind for September was Bruce Springsteen's The Rising, inspired by and recorded soon after 9/11. As the Rolling Stone review put it, "The music is often fierce in its execution, but in essence it is a requiem for those who perished in that sudden inferno, and those who died trying to save them."

"Into the Fire" contains a lot of grief, but it has a surprisingly uplifting chorus. "You're Missing," on the other hand, is just devastatingly sad - a rumination on the negative space left behind by all the lives lost on September 11th.

September Gurls - Big Star
How about a nice upbeat song for a change?  Sorry Katy Perry, but Big Star beat you to the misspelling of "gurls" by forty years - this song was released in 1974.

Big Star is one of those bands that a lot of my favorite bands name-check when listing their influences, and I only recently decided to check them out for myself and I liked what I heard - very Byrds-y, which is cool by me.

The Bangles recorded a surprisingly faithful cover of this song in the 80's:



Wake Me Up When September Ends - Green Day
This song drove me crazy when it came out, but revisiting it now after 7 years (wow - time flies) it's kind of grown on me.

This song continues the "sleep through entire months" theme from the previous Year of Songs post. Who knew there were so many songs on this theme? I feel pressure to find ones for October, November, and December. My favorite song on this theme, however, has to be Belle and Sebastian's "Sleep the Clock Around":



September in the Rain - Dinah Washington
This is a standard covered by a lot of great singers, but I saw an interview today with Tony Bennett in which he compared Amy Winehouse to Dinah Washington, so I thought I'd pick Dinah Washington's version. And it's great.

Try to Remember (The Kind of September) - From The Fantasticks
This is one of the most common songs that voice teachers assign to beginning students. Having lived in that world for many years, I'm actually a little burned out on it. However, hearing this recording while assembling this playlist was actually the first time that I'd ever heard a well-trained singer doing this song. Guess what - turns out it's actually a nice little song.

See You in September - Frankie Avalon & the Four Seasons
In my high school choir we practiced an arrangement of this song for several weeks, and then the choir teacher was like, "Nevermind. Let's not do that one." That's my sole connection to this song.

September - Jessye Norman
And we'll end with this gorgeous lied by Richard Strauss. By the time Strauss wrote this song in 1948, no one was writing lush, Wagnerian music like this anymore - most serious composers had moved on to writing increasingly atonal music. Strauss himself had been at the forefront of the movement towards atonality with his shocking opera Salome in 1905. However, I think it's kind of beautiful that at age 84, when writing his very last songs ("September" comes from a set that is called Vier letzte Lieder [Four Last Songs] and they are literally his last compositions) Strauss returned to the Romantic style of his youth.

In case you're wondering who Richard Strauss is, allow me to jog your memory with what is no doubt his most famous work:


By the way, I picked Jessye Norman's recording of "September" for two reasons: 1) It's exquisite, and 2) She's probably the greatest singer to ever come out of the University of Michigan. Go Blue!

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As always, if you have any song suggestions for October, please leave them below in the comments. (Especially if you know of a song about sleeping through the whole month of October.)

A Part of the Main

 I have a friend at Yahoo! who is originally from the Ann Arbor area, went to school at the University of Michigan, and is fanatical about Michigan Wolverines football. He told me that there is a pub in downtown Portland that shows every Michigan game and that a healthy crowd of Michigan alums turn up for the occasion. I work during the day on Saturdays so normally I wouldn't be able to attend, but yesterday was the much ballyhooed first night game ever in Michigan Stadium, so after work I headed down to The Thirsty Lion to check out the game.

Ann Arbor, Michigan is roughly 1,934 miles from here. Prior to this afternoon, I would have never imagined that a scene like this could ever take place in Portland, Oregon:

I asked the man distributing the University of Michigan Alumni Association name tags (yes, they had name tags, and yes, they are an official branch of the Alumni Association) how many Michigan fans were at the bar, and he said well over two hundred.

The atmosphere at the pub was electric. That was mostly due to the game, which was one of the most dramatic sporting events I have ever watched (see a video recap here): there were three touchdowns and lead changes in the final 1:12, and Michigan came from behind to seal the victory with a mere two seconds left on the clock. At that moment, the pub burst into utter pandemonium. Everyone in the place, myself included, was bouncing up and down, screaming, hugging and/or high-fiving every perfect stranger within 10 feet, and of course, singing "Hail to the Victors" at the top of our lungs.

However, there was something besides the game that made the night feel so special. Looking around at all the alums young and old (some very old) clad in Michigan Maize and Blue, it made me feel like I was a part of something so much larger than myself. The Alumni Association's website states: "With more than 460,000 living Michigan alumni, the Alumni Association represents one of the largest alumni bodies in the world." I feel a tremendous amount of pride to be a Wolverine, and though I know but a small fraction of them, I feel a strong connection to the 460,000 others out there.

Michigan football is one of the primary channels through which I feel that connection. It's not like I have a strong connection to football in general - I had never actually watched a football game of any sort before I moved to Ann Arbor, and the team had three of the most regrettable seasons in its storied history while I was a student there. Regardless, Michigan football seems to transcend time and circumstance and reach into something deeper inside me. (Judging by my Facebook news feed immediately after the game, a whole lot of my Michigan friends share this sentiment.) Even before the game, as I watched the players run out onto the field and jump up to touch the "GO BLUE" banner as part of their pregame ritual, I had goosebumps.

The elation I felt after my communal experience watching Michigan's dramatic victory was a stark change from how I had been feeling earlier in the day. In the course of my work I land on the Yahoo! homepage frequently, and in the past few weeks they have been featuring a lot of content commemorating the tenth anniversary of 9/11. Part of the way through the day I clicked on a photo slideshow called "9/11: The 25 Most Powerful Photos." As I clicked through the photos and read the captions, I had a breakdown and began to cry at my desk.

I spent September 11, 2001 in Campinas, Brazil as a missionary. It was a Tuesday morning, so we went to a district meeting as usual. Afterwards, (Elder) Sam Green, my missionary companion at the time, and I had lunch with a woman from church. Early on in the lunch I remember her saying that she had seen something strange on the TV. She asked, "What's the name of that really big city in America?" I said, "Uh, New York?" "Yeah, that's the one," she answered. "What's the name of the really tall, famous building there?" I thought for a moment. "The Empire State Building, maybe?" To which she replied, "Yeah, I think that's it. I saw on TV that it got bombed or fell over or something." I thought she must have been confused or was maybe talking about a movie that was on TV.

Halfway through the meal the we got a phone call from the bishop saying that we needed to stop everything and get over to his house immediately. I don't believe he even mentioned what the reason was. So we hurried over to Bishop Sérgio's place where the news was playing. I was totally stunned - it didn't seem like it was real. The whole thing felt so distant - it was happening in a country that was so far away, being reported on the TV in a language that was not my native tongue.

The Brazilian news didn't seem to have very much footage. They kept looping the same piece of video taken from the street level looking up at the second tower as it exploded. The camera then whipped back down to focus on  a man with a look of sheer terror on his face who collapsed as if his nerves had stopped firing the necessary messages to his muscles in order for him to stay standing. They showed that man collapsing over and over and over again, and I remember thinking of the scripture in Luke about "men's hearts failing them for fear" in the last days.

I don't remember exactly how long we stayed there watching the news - an hour, maybe two hours. The bishop wanted us to stay longer and keep watching (I think he understood that we needed to let it sink in), but I remember thinking that there was nothing we could do about it, so we should probably just get back to work.

The life of a missionary is very disconnected from the media, so a lot of what I heard about life in America in the immediate aftermath of 9/11 was through my parents' letters. They talked about how people displayed flags everywhere, how everyone became nicer, and how the country as a whole had been brought together by the tragedy. However, by the time I got back home to the United States in July of 2002, the country had already started to move on, which left me feeling like I never had a chance to be a part of what is perhaps the defining American experience of my lifetime. And in a weird way I have felt like there is an essential component of American-ness that I have been missing because of that.

Do you remember Charlie Brown's opening monologue from A Charlie Brown Christmas, where he laments that he doesn't understand The True Meaning of Christmas? Here's a refresher:

 If you substitute 9/11 for Christmas, that's how I have felt for the past 10 years:

"I think there must be something wrong with me... I don't feel the way I'm supposed to feel. I just don't understand 9/11, I guess."

For the past few weeks I have been following the 9/11 retrospectives in the media particularly closely because I saw it as an opportunity to gain some great insight into The True Meaning of 9/11. When I clicked on that photo slideshow at work, I was overwhelmed by how fresh and raw it all felt to me, having never seen any of the images before. I went through so many emotions in a matter of minutes - terror, anger, sadness at the loss of life and our country's loss of innocence.* I felt my heart ache for the victims, for their families, for the survivors covered in ashes, for the brave ones pulling bodies out of the rubble, for the men whose hearts failed them for fear, and for our great nation.

You may think it odd that a post about Michigan football veered off into a "Where Were You on 9/11" story. I had originally planned a much more straightforward post about how I feel on the 10th anniversary of the attack. However, on the drive home from the pub last night I was thinking about the extremes of my day, and how both a football team and the commemoration of a national tragedy had made me feel like I am connected to something larger than myself. I don't want to sound like I'm trivializing 9/11, but something about sharing that experience with all those Michigan alums in a pub thousands of miles away from that football game helped me make some sense out of my feelings about 9/11.

I didn't know a thing about Michigan football until September 2007, yet I still feel like I have some kind of place inside of that tradition. I've been an American my whole life (and a proud one to boot). Although I wasn't physically located in the country on 9/11 and my missionary calling prevented me from following the media coverage of the aftermath, I think I can rest from my search for The True Meaning of 9/11 because on this day I do feel a strong connection to my fellow Americans. 

*While I was writing this post, I saw a note pop up in my Facebook news feed written by my friend Bryan, whose 9/11 story is eerily similar to my own (on a mission in Brazil at the time, never felt like he processed it, broke down this week while looking at a photo slideshow, our two names are homophones, etc.). In his brief note he expressed some thoughts that are very similar to what I have written here. He articulated a few things so well that I hope he doesn't mind that I have borrowed some of his phrasing. Seeing his note was a really unexpected moment of feeling a connection to someone.

Note - I took the title of this post from a well-known poem by John Donne:

No man is an island entire of itself; every man
is a piece of the continent, a part of the main;
if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe
is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as
well as a manor of thy friends or of thine
own were; any man's death diminishes me,
because I am involved in mankind.
And therefore never send to know for whom
the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.

SST: The Yellow Yahoo

SESAME STREET TUESDAY

A few weeks ago I got a big purple box in the mail. When I opened it up, it made this sound:

Enclosed was a purple Yahoo!-branded t-shirt, a folder stuffed with information about benefits plans, and a offer of full-time employment. I have to give Yahoo! a lot of credit - they know how to make their employees feel cool and wanted.

As I have previously mentioned in this space, when I was first hired by Yahoo!, I was just a temporary contractor hired through an outside agency. I worked for Yahoo! Brasil for 4 months, and then they extended my temporary contract and moved me over to the US Mail Tech team, where I have been for about three months.  Effective August 29th, they decided to "roll me over," or make me an actual Yahoo! employee rather than just a contractor through an agency. This is great because I don't have to worry about whether they would extend my contract again when the current one runs out. Plus I am now eligible for benefits and bonuses, and I got a nice little pay bump too.

While I have missed working with my Latin American buddies (I still go to lunch with them every day), I have enjoyed working on the US team. In fact, my unique position as one who has worked on both the Latin American and US teams has put me in a position to be very useful. At my behest, my bosses have given me the unofficial title of "Latin American Ambassador," meaning that anytime the US team receives new policies or content or resources, I inform the Latin American team, give tutorials, and sometimes translate documents into Portuguese.

When the US Mail Team gets really backlogged, we have a bunch of helpers that we can pull in from all over the site to help us out. However, when the Brazil team gets backlogged, I am the only person on the site who can help them because of the language barrier. That combined with my "Latin American Ambassador" responsibilities make my job really satisfying because I feel like I have something unique to contribute to the company.

So I too must yodel "Ya-HOOOO-ooo!" for having a secure employment. Too bad this guy is not purple, or Yahoo! could use him as their company mascot:

Year of Songs: August and Everything Before

I seem to have gotten a little bit behind, eh? Let's lump the summer months together:



August:
August Day Song - Bebel Gilberto
Bebel Gilberto is musical royalty in Brazil - her father João and mother Astrud, along with composer Tom Jobim, practically invented the sound of bossa nova on immortal classics such as "The Girl from Ipanema" (I posted my performance of it here). I really like Bebel - she stays true to the spirit of bossa but gives it a nice modern feel.

August - Rilo Kiley
Sure, Jenny Lewis has done pretty well for herself as a member of Rilo Kiley and as a solo artist, but she reached her peak as an artist at age thirteen when she co-starred in the cinematic masterpiece/shameless Nintendo propaganda film The Wizard:



Perfect Blue Buildings - Counting Crows My favorite song off of the once-ubiquitous August and Everything After. Plus, the lyric "so help me stay awake, I'm falling asleep in perfect blue buildings" fits in well with the oversleeping theme in "Lorelai" and "July" (see below). 

I Dreamed I Saw St. Augustine - Bob Dylan
Stretching the August thing a little bit, here's a favorite Dylan tune.

July:

Tears of Rage - Bob Dylan and The Band
Tears of Rage - The Band
One Headlight - Wallflowers
Speaking of Dylan, here's a trilogy of Independence Day-related Dylan songs:
• The song "Tears of Rage" opens with the line "We carried you in our arms on Independence Day." Bob Dylan made the demo-style recording of this song heard here with The Band in 1967 without any plans of ever releasing it. It eventually surfaced on the 1975 collection The Basement Tapes, which is probably my favorite Dylan album.
• The Band then reworked the song extensively and released it in 1968 as the first track on their debut album, Music from Big Pink, one of my all-time favorite albums.
• Jakob Dylan, son of Bob, references Independence Day on one of my high school favs, "One Headlight."
Lorelai - Fleet Foxes
Speaking of Dylan again, this July-related song sounds remarkably like the 1965 Bob Dylan song "4th Time Around." It also reminds me of my girls.

July - Low
The previous song said, "I slept through July," but this one takes oversleeping to an even greater extreme: "They'll never wake us in time Maybe we'll wait 'til July Then August, September October, November or December."

If you don't know Low, check out the fantastic "Try to Sleep," released earlier this year. I couldn't stop listening to it for weeks.

1° de Julho (First of July) - Legião Urbana
My favorite Brazilian rock band. A few weeks ago I played a solo acoustic set at Best Buy (yeah, you read that right) and I did a guitar/harmonica cover of their song "Teatro dos Vampiros (Theater of the Vampires)." If songwriter Renato Russo had written his songs in English, we'd rank him among Neil Young, Joni Mitchell, Jim Morrison, and the rest of the great rock lyricists.

Christmas in July - Sufjan Stevens
Suggestion from Amy J: "If you hadn't already thought of it, I think you should include Sufjan Stevens' 'Christmas in July' on your upcoming blog post - it feels like kind of a nice mid-year homage to the Christmas playlist that inspired the year in songs."

June:
June is Busting Out - Benny Goodman
The first song that popped into my head when I thought of June songs. This is from Rodgers and Hammerstein's Carousel, but in the context of the show it's way to hard to extract it from the surrounding music and have it stand alone. So I'm glad I found this swingin' Benny Goodman version from 1945 (the same year Carousel opened).

Ghost Town - The Specials
Like "Ohio" on the May Year of Songs playlist, this song was written, recorded, and released at whirlwind speed in June, 1981 in reaction to events that left a nation in shock. In this case the song was written about a rash of race riots that raged all over England that summer, causing the police to enforce a strict curfew in some cities. "This town is coming like a ghost town, all the clubs have been closed down... Bands won't play no more, too much fighting on the dance floor."

Despite its unfortunate origins, this song is just all kinds of awesome and I wanted to find some way to sneak it onto this playlist. Easily my favorite song from my birth year.

Surfin' U.S.A.
"We can't wait for June!" A few months ago I taught a group guitar lesson to nine kids ranging from 8-11 years of age and we learned this song. My song choice at a previous group lesson hadn't gone over very well ("Love Me Do," since the majority of the song has just 2 chords), so I was thrilled that some of them had actually had heard it before - they had learned it in school - and that they liked it (Hey Mikey!).

June Hymn - Decemberists
Back in January they gave us "January Hymn," and now "June Hymn." Even their name is month-y.

A Couple of Swells - Fred Astaire and Judy Garland
A song that lumps the summer months together, just I have done in this post: "In June, July, and August we look cute when we're dressed in shorts." This is most famously used in the film Easter Parade (mentioned in a previous Year of Songs post):



Bonus June Track:
I'll Be On My Way - The Beatles
As I have noted in the past, Grooveshark doesn't seem to have any Beatles recordings in their catalogue. This is a nice little rarity from the Live at the BBC collection released in the '90s. As the album title suggest, this Lennon/McCartney original was recorded live for a radio show, and the Beatles never did make a studio recording of it:

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Believe it or not, September is an extremely fertile month for songs, so hopefully I'll get that one up before the last day of the month. As always, if you have a song suggestion for next month, please let me know in the comments below!

Happy Trails

For my final Master's recital back in 2007, I did an entire program of extended oratorio excerpts: all of the character Jonathan's arias from Handel's Saul, the first big recitative and aria from Beethoven's Christ on the Mount of Olives, and, most ambitiously, the entire first half of Sir Edward Elgar's The Dream of Gerontius.

The Dream of Gerontius is a criminally underappreciated masterwork on a truly epic, Wagnerian scale. In my recital, I sang the role of Gerontius, and I recruited friends from the Cathedral of the Madeleine in Salt Lake City to be the choir (a shout-out to my pianist Emily as well). Most of the first half of the piece is an extended musical monologue for the character of Gerontius with occasional interjections from the chorus. Gerontius is on his deathbed, contemplating the eternal fate of his soul before finally giving up the ghost just before the end of the first half of the work. Seconds after he slips away ("Into Thy hands, oh Lord," he sings), a Priest (a baritone, sung by my friend Tyler at my recital) enters and initiates a glorious chorus to send the spirit of Gerontius off into the next life:

Proficiscere, anima Christiana, de hoc mundo!
Go forth upon thy journey, Christian soul!
Go from this world! Go, in the Name of God
The Omnipotent Father, Who created thee!
Go, in the Name of Jesus Christ, our Lord,
Son of the Living God, Who bled for thee!
Go, in the Name of the Holy Spirit,
Who Hath been poured out on thee!

I don't even have words to describe how powerfully this music affects me. For me it thrillingly captures the majesty of this scripture from The Book of Mormon:

Now, concerning the state of the soul between death and the resurrection—Behold, it has been made known unto me by an angel, that the spirits of all men, as soon as they are departed from this mortal body, yea, the spirits of all men, whether they be good or evil, are taken home to that God who gave them life. (Alma 40:11)

Gerontius came to mind two weeks ago when I heard that my grandpa had died. He was 95, had led a rich, full life, had accomplished everything he wanted to do in life, and was healthy up until the end when he slipped away gently in his sleep. He was a tremendously hard-working man, and left an incredible legacy of righteousness for his family. If there is anyone that could feel prepared to return to God, I think it was Grandpa Tanner.

I was asked to perform a musical number at the funeral, and my mind first went to something classical along the lines of Gerontius or old funeral standbys like "O Divine Redeemer" or "You'll Never Walk Alone." Though the sentiments found in those pieces are certainly fitting for the great man that was my grandpa, that kind of music just wasn't his style. My grandpa was a cowboy:

Grandma Tanner (also 95) suggested that Grandpa would have wanted cowboy songs at his funeral. I immediately jumped on board with her suggestion and prepared a medley of cowboy songs mixed in with the hymn "How Great Thou Art." Thematically I thought it worked really well: "How Great Thou Art" expresses wonder at the magnificence of the world that Heavenly Father created for us, and one of the ways that Grandpa partook of that magnificence was out riding his horses.

He loved these old songs too - I remember riding around in his truck accompanied by the sounds of The Sons of the Pioneers and other singers from that era. Here are the two Cowboy songs I mixed into the medley, "Tumbling Tumbleweeds" and "Cool Water":


I was really proud of the arrangement I put together, but I was afraid that people wouldn't get it, or worse, think it was inappropriate that I was up at the front of the chapel with a guitar singing lines like, "I'm a roamin' cowboy, ridin' all day long." I felt good about my performance, but I returned to my pew feeling uncertain about its reception until my uncle Don got up to speak. "I was doing okay 'til Brian got up," he began. "Brian, thank you for capturing the heart and soul of Dad. He loved horses and Heavenly Father. That was beautiful. Thank you."

At that point I just started bawling. I loved and admired my grandpa and I really wanted to honor him. My uncle's comments confirmed that the message of my song - "horses and Heavenly Father" - had been received.

There was one more musical number besides mine, performed just before the closing prayer - a duet with guitar of the old cowboy classic "Happy Trails":


Happy trails, Grandpa, until we meet again.

Red Ryder BB Gun

Ralphie knows exactly what he wants:



He doesn't just want any old BB Gun, he wants "an official Red Ryder, carbine action, 200-shot range model air rifle." When I was a kid a remember how specific I was about things that I wanted, too. However, as I have gotten older I seem to have gotten less specific about certain things that I want. For instance, when I was shopping around for a new guitar, I had a few criteria that I was looking for (steel string, cutaway, acoustic/electric), but I didn't have a specific brand or model number in mind before I eventual settled on Tigrão.

However, over the last few months I rediscovered how fun it is to want something really specific and make plans to get it. I'm grateful to Mike McMurtrey for bequeathing Laddie the Laptop to me, but he wasn't exactly top of the line when I got him and he's gone steadily downhill since then. Observe:

The hinges that hold up the screen broke beyond repair, so for a while I could only use the computer if I first found a sturdy object to lean the screen against. However, my brother-in-law Tom, a highly skilled mechanical engineer, rigged me up a piece of string duct-taped to the top and bottom of the computer to make the thing a little more portable (and making it into an object of great curiosity for onlookers).

The battery was shot before I got the computer, so whenever I used it I had to have it plugged in. However, the power source's cord became so frayed that I had to strip the paper off part of a twist tie and wrap the metal around the exposed wires to complete the circuit. It was always very temperamental - sometimes I had to tweak the tightness or placement of the twist tie for 5 minutes before that dang green power light would finally come on.

But this is all external and says nothing of the computer's performance. Let's say I wanted to open Word. After double-clicking the icon, I could take a bathroom break, go out and check the mailbox, and pour myself a bowl of cereal in about the time that it would take Word to load. The total size of the hard drive was about 27 GB, so I had to store a lot of my pictures on a flash drive and crank down the bit rate of my MP3 files to 64 kbps (ridiculously low) just so that I could fit them on my hard drive.

For 8 of the 9 years that I was in college I never had a computer and I did all my computing at school computer labs, which at both Utah and Michigan were populated almost exclusively with Macs. I got so used to Macs that when I came into possession of a PC I found myself wondering why certain things about it had to be so annoying and why couldn't it just work smoothly like a Mac.

So you could say that my Red Ryder BB Gun has been a Macbook Pro. They are not the cheapest things, but luckily my Michigan student ID card does not expire until 2015, so I was able to get a nice student discount. I actually waited for about six weeks before my purchase because I was told by Apple employees that during the summer they would run a back-to-school special wherein they give away a free iPod Touch (a $229 value) with each computer purchase. However, much to my chagrin, the Apple employees were wrong; the promotion was changed this year to be a $100 gift card to the Mac App store. Bleh. Oh well, I'll hang onto it and maybe it will be useful at some point in the future. And they did throw in a free printer, so that was cool.

My MacBook* has been really fun so far. My favorite thing to mess around with right now is Garage Band, a music recording program. I picked up some cables and adapters so that I can plug my guitar straight into the computer - my two big toys plugging into each other. Over the last year and a half I've made a lot of recordings of me playing my guitar and singing with the crude little microphone and voice memos tool on my iPod**, so compared to that Garage Band is like having a whole laboratory where I can add all kinds of effects to my acoustic guitar or voice and layer multiple tracks on top of each other.

I've never been the kind of guy who usually splurges on big toys, but so far it's been great and fun and I have no regrets. I just hope I don't shoot my eye out.

*I have yet to give it a proper name. My roommate mistakenly referred to it as a "Mactop" the other day, and I though that was kind of funny. Any other suggestions?

**Which is not as crude as the recording method I used as a teenager, as described in this post. It would be fun to recreate that "Capital I" recording.